SOMA West


Traumatic Week In Store for Western SoMa
September 23, 2009, 7:53 pm
Filed under: Culture, Events

sw-traumafilming

As if the presence of 400,000 naked or near-naked leather enthusiasts parading outside one’s window this Sunday isn’t enough trauma for one week, “more colorful” network NBC is apparently planning on taking advantage of our shell-shocked and/or hung over state to inflict a little more pain on the neighborhood. The above notice was posted in the lobby of my building, and bears the news that  the new NBC series “Trauma” (crazy loud link btw) will be shutting down a major intersection in Western SoMa for five freakin’ days. Streets to be closed to all vehicular traffic include Folsom between 11th and 13th, 12th between Howard and Harrison, plus wee alley Norfolk between Folsom and Harrison. On a map, it looks like this:

sw-map-trauma

The schedule is a little eye-popping as well: 7am-8pm (13 hours) daily, Monday September 28 – Friday October 2. Gulp! Now, one hopes that perhaps the amusingly named Open 4 Business Productions (er, nothing compares 2 U guys!) is erring on the side of caution, getting a permit for filming for as much time as possible when they’ll actually only need a few hours on Thursday for a shot of Nurse 1 having a quick makeout with Patient 2. And please, make that a nice quiet makeout. On the other hand, “Trauma” is the show that freaked the hell out of everybody in town back in March by creating a gigantic explosion on 280 for their pilot episode, premiering next Monday night. In fact, all sorts of loud stuff, like explosions, crashes, sirens and screams of pain all seem like they might be regular parts of this show, and since my windows look right out into the cordoned-off area, I’m a bit concerned about this 7am call time. Shit blowing up outside my window at 7am could make me pull a Terylin Joe, but Facebook friends suggested fighting fire with fire by putting my stereo speakers in the windows and blasting them with some indie rock, or whatever. Neither seem like good options.

Either way, the terrible early reviews of the show make me feel like this whole thing might turn out a like the last time I got to see some filming up close. Ang Lee’s  “Hulk” shot a major scene right outside my office in North Beach back in 2003, and while it was exciting at the time to see military helicopters apparently heading right for us, “Hulk” turned out to be so terrible that nobody I knew actually felt like watching it for long enough to see our building’s cameo. So, honestly, it turned out to be more of an embarrassment than anything. “Trauma” seems forgettable at best, and Manimal at worst, so I’ll have to make sure I use the back door all next week, lest I unwittingly add the show to my IMDB resume.

Ultimately, it seems all too likely that after our kooky  S&M celebration causes us pain, “Trauma” will step in and, well, create some trauma. Oh, the irony. Does anybody know the safe word?

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